The Perils of Flat-Pack Furniture and Incidental Dragons

Arthur was attempting to assemble a flat-pack bookshelf, a task he considered only slightly less complex than untangling a cosmic string. The instructions, he noted, were "ambitious." He had just located the elusive 'Dovetail Peg 7b' when a small, rather singed dragon, no larger than a house cat but undeniably draconic, flew through his open window. It exhaled a puff of smoke at his prize-winning begonias, landed precariously on his coffee table, and promptly knocked over a half-finished cup of lukewarm tea.

Arthur blinked. He picked up the now empty teacup, observing it with the detached interest of an anthropologist studying a relic. "Well," he observed, in a tone usually reserved for commenting on the slight dampness of a Tuesday morning, "that's certainly suboptimal for the begonias. And the tea was just starting to reach peak lukewarmness."

The dragon sneezed, a tiny spark narrowly missing his eyebrow, and looked at him with an expression that suggested it expected a treat.

Arthur sighed, a sound that conveyed the accumulated weariness of a thousand minor inconveniences, most of which involved poorly designed kitchen appliances. "I suppose you're not here to assist with the hex key, are you?" He gestured vaguely towards the bewildering array of wooden panels and screws. "Because, frankly, this particular shelving unit seems to operate under the assumption that I possess three hands, two of which are ambidextrous, and the third is prehensile."

The dragon tilted its head, then let out a small burp, producing a faint whiff of sulfur and slightly overcooked marshmallow.

"Right," Arthur said, nodding slowly. "Just as I suspected. Another non-contributing member of society, then." He looked from the dragon, now settling in for a nap on his coffee table, to the cryptic instructions. "I trust you won't be expecting any structural support from that coffee table, either. It's rather fond of its own integrity, I find." He returned to the bookshelf, muttering, "At least it's not another unsolicited opinion on my choice of wall art."